Challenges

Writing about the creation of life is about beginning again. There is so much information available today for most people who are trying to conceive. Websites, blogs, advertisements, all leading to potential answers and antidotes which will certainly help you become pregnant. After having gone through so many infertility treatments, experiments on my body, mind and soul, it would inevitable lead to the "Begin Again". And, every time, the begin again was so excruciating and so painful, and yet there was the promise of next time. This is where the mind is so powerful over being influenced by those involved in this multi-million dollar industry. Your goal is to be a parent and you will go through things so incredible to have a… [more]

For Mother's Day my husband and daughter treated me to a wonderful dinner at one of my favorite Italian restaurants. My daughter who is six years old still needs to be reminded to use her utensils and not her fingers and to sit properly in her chair from time to time. In other words, she needs to be reminded to use her restaurant manners. So, upon leaving the restaurant after our meal, we couldn't help but beam with pride when a woman at a neighboring table complimented my daughter for her excellent table manners and her behavior in general. Then it happened. Totally out of left field the woman asked if we were my daughter’s parents… [more]

In most societies, it is assumed that girls will grow up and have babies. We, as girls are given dolls to play with, babysit, help with others' kids and are taught nurturing skills in preparation to become a Mom. Historically, women had children at a much younger age and had more children. As women entered the work force, the size of families steadily became smaller and women waited later to start their families. Awaiting - It is a word that describes a longing for something. And, with the decision to become a Mom, we are awaiting the moment that we know is coming; we will be pregnant and have a baby. It is natural. Awaiting, for the woman… [more]

Welcome back!  In my last entry, it was March of 2002, and I had just suffered my first miscarriage, after a year and a half of trying to get pregnant.  In early May, as we awaited the non-arrival of my period, I imagined a wonderful Mother’s Day weekend wherein we announced this pregnancy.  I was 10 days late and had never been late before, except when I had been briefly pregnant.  However, just to be sure, we were going to wait until Mother’s Day to take the test.  On Friday before Mother’s Day, however, the worst weekend of our lives began.  My husband’s beloved mother passed away.  It was a weekend filled with pain and loss.  To make things even worse, we… [more]

Welcome to the new series of Fertility Blogs! As a Mom and a woman who had some of the most excruciating experiences with my infertility treatments, I can empathize and sympathize with every woman, man and family during these emotional times. A friend once asked me to describe myself, using one word, starting with the letter of the alphabet. This gave me 26 ways to describe myself and I felt compelled to accept the challenge; knowing it would be simple, right? I began to ask other friends, family and colleagues to use a word that best described me in their eyes. Some were hilarious, others poignant, and still some even stung. As a columnist, I began a series on life from A-Z and it… [more]

Greetings, fellow adoption journeyers!  New blogger here.  My name is  Jamaica and I'm the lucky mom of 4 great kids who came to us through adoption...with another on the way!   Each one has a funny, unique story of their journey to becoming our son or daughter, and over the course of time, I invite you to learn about us and how we became a family.  But, first I will share with you how it all began, because many of you may now be where I was a decade ago. As a young woman, in my early 20s,  I took it for granted that I would marry and have children.  But the failure of my first marriage put an end to that...or at least… [more]

When asked about the worst medication that I had to take when undergoing IVF, my surprising answer is - birth control pills. Of course, I didn’t love the shots, or hot flashes caused by other medicines, but the hormonal surges, caused by “the pill,” were by far the hardest to endure. I took birth control pills prior to trying to conceive (obviously before I knew that was unnecessary) and never found one without overwhelming side-effects. The pill made me moody and anxious, sad or irritable, gave me headaches, and just generally did not contribute to a good quality of life. The difference when I was taking them and when I wasn’t was so pronounced that it… [more]

It seems to me like I meet more people who are experiencing infertility all the time. This may be that I'm drawn to these men and women because I feel a connection with them or maybe it is something else. A lot of people feel that some couples are experiencing infertility at a higher rate because they are waiting until they are older to start having a family. But I've come across one person who has a different opinion on the matter. This person feels that more people are experiencing infertility because there are simply less spirits ready to come to Earth. This person believes that a finite amount of souls were made before/during the creation of the Earth. Then one by one… [more]

We should never assume or expect things in life. I know this, I remind myself of this, but yet I still do it. For some reason I assumed that if I put an effort forth to having a child than I would get one. All I needed to do was show that I was ready and really wanted one and then it would happen. It's naive, but it's what got me through the day. So when the day came that I found out I was pregnant I became overwhelmed with joy. I wanted to tell everyone and have them share the joy with me. I started thinking of baby names, ideas for a nursery, and looking online at maternity clothes. I had… [more]

I belong to a church that has a beautiful focus on families and the sacredness of them. This is a wonderful thing, except when you're infertile and feel like you're going to hell if you don't have a kid by age 25. I don't mean to bash the teachings of my church; I'm just trying to express the hardships that I dealt with being infertile in a congregation of mothers with large families. Our church has a tradition of handing out flowers on Mothers' Day to everyone woman. The first year I just kind of laughed at the idea of getting flowers when I wasn't a mother yet. The second and third years weren't as cute or funny though. When I was… [more]