Fertility Myths

About four years ago my mother-in-law gave me a fertility doll that was supposed to give me good luck in efforts to conceive. Either I have unrealistic expectations on how fast that doll was supposed to work, or my particular fertility doll was faulty. Either way I don't think I can give credit to the doll for working four years later! The fertility "aid" got me thinking though, about the pressure from other people when we were having trouble conceiving, and my motivations behind so desperately wanting to have a baby. I sometimes had to take a step back and make sure that the main reason I wanted a child was for me and my husband, not to… [more]

In this era of "octomoms" and families of 8 or 18 it is easy to understand how people can have misconceptions about infertility and its treatment. As I was searching for information and statistics regarding multiple births and fertility treatment (out of pure curiosity), I realized that there are A LOT of myths and misunderstandings when it comes to reproductive challenges and assistance. I, like a lot of other people, don't always know the difference between truth and fiction when it comes to infertility and so I thought I would use this blog as a forum to address some of those myths and try to find the truths. Probably one of the most prevalent general ideas about IVF… [more]

Today a friend of mine who has struggled with secondary infertility for six years gave birth to a healthy baby boy! The event prompted me to think back on our many conversations about trying to conceive and how afraid and scared we were to try IVF. My overwhelming wish throughout that time was to just finally get pregnant naturally and not have to "pull the trigger" and try in-vitro. As I remembered these thoughts and feelings I was shocked at the realization that now that I look back at my fertility journey I am actually glad that we moved on to IVF. That is definitely not something that I ever thought I would say… [more]

One of the fertility myths that annoys me the most is the misperception that adopting a child will cause you to become pregnant. The media continues to perpetuate this myth, which might be one reason that people seem to buy into this nonsense.

I adopted my son almost seven years ago, and I have not become pregnant. I know many other adoptive parents, and very few have conceived babies after adopting. While there are some adoptive parents who do go on to have a biological child, most do not. According to the Encyclopedia of Adoption, less than 10% of adoptive mothers go on to bear biological children.

I have read other studies stating that the percentage of pregnancies after adoption are consistent with the… [more]

When I was trying to conceive, I lost count of the number of "solutions" to our woes offered by well-meaning family and friends. I can look back now and see the humor in these suggestions. However, when I was going through the process, I was not amused.

Here are some of the solutions that I was offered:

• Just relax.
• Go on a cruise.
• Buy a two-seater car.
• Have sex in the back seat of a car.
• Drink cough syrup to thin your cervical fluids.
• Hold your legs in the air for 20 minutes after sex. (That was an attractive view for my husband!)
• Have sex every day for 5 days throughout your ovulation period.

"Womankind: Is Seasonale® Reasonable?" Elaine Stillerman, LMT, wrote the above article for Massage Today, a publication that I receive. She is upset with the marketing of Seasonale®, and wonders if other women feel the same way. Is there anyone else feeling disgusted and outraged at the latest assault on women by the pharmaceutical industry? Are women so gullible that we believe these mega-billion dollar giants have our best interests in mind when they claim that the female reproductive system is broken and needs fixing? I was sitting home one evening, minding my own business, when a commercial for Seasonale® came on. In the ad, several 20-something waifs, clad in white dresses with pink polka dots, were kicking the dots as they fell… [more]

"Just relax" There is hardly any one comment that makes trying-to-be parents as crazy as the above statement. It seems to say that there is a "blame" to lay on someone, and you are the intended target, since you are so incapable of handling your stress, you are being punished by not having a child. Well, at least this is how I took it! Speaking to others, I don't think that I was alone in this reaction. I came across an article from the 2005 issue of Health magazine titled, "Stress and Your Fertility" by Susan Dominus. Needless to say, I was curious. The article deals with interrupted menstrual cycles which could bring on infertility in women who have waited to have children. Dr. Sarah Berga from Emory… [more]

Continuing with my personal infertility myths experience: #6 Your Fertility Problems Are All In Your Head. This myth felt true, each time I went in to the doctor and didn't receive any other explanation for our difficulties other than, "It hasn't been that long." or "Don't worry, you're young." Although we never received a medical diagnosis, I have my own theories about our problems conceiving and carrying our kids. #7 If You Wait Long Enough, You'll Get Pregnant. Another myth that I'd never heard of. #8 Infertility Will Break Up Your Marriage. Infertility issues are stressful on every one involved. This of course, leads to stress within the relationship. Yes, some marriages will break up, but some won't. #9 If You've Previously Had A Baby, Then You're Not Infertile. When my health care… [more]

Yesterday I posted 10 infertility myths that I found on about.com by Kim Elise Goldman. Today I'm going to post my experiences with the first five of these myths along with some facts that were printed in the article. #1 Getting Pregnant Is Easy Not so in our case. Although we did get pregnant a few months after trying, once we made the decision, we were ready to be pregnant NOW. Acording to Goldman, one in ten couples have some sort of difficulties achieving pregnancy. #2 If You Have Periods, You'll Get Pregnant. This was one of the myths that I had never heard of. #3 If You Adopt, You'll Get Pregnant. Now this is a myth that I am guilty of perpetuating. I remember saying this at least twice… [more]

With May Day behind us, I put some thought towards myths that exist for current times. Although most of us do not worship gods and goddesses anymore there are still myths that we deal with on a daily basis. This got me thinking about myths regarding fertility and infertility that some of us have experienced either directly or indirectly. I know that while I was trying to conceive, experiencing my pregnancy, then adopting there were many off-hand remarks said to me, that were not fact-based. It seemed like everyone had an opinion, or an answer whether I asked for it or not! Knowing me though, I probably did ask for many of them. I can't seem to keep my mouth shut when it comes to… [more]