Secondary Infertility

Writing about the creation of life is about beginning again. There is so much information available today for most people who are trying to conceive. Websites, blogs, advertisements, all leading to potential answers and antidotes which will certainly help you become pregnant. After having gone through so many infertility treatments, experiments on my body, mind and soul, it would inevitable lead to the "Begin Again". And, every time, the begin again was so excruciating and so painful, and yet there was the promise of next time. This is where the mind is so powerful over being influenced by those involved in this multi-million dollar industry. Your goal is to be a parent and you will go through things so incredible to have a… [more]

For Mother's Day my husband and daughter treated me to a wonderful dinner at one of my favorite Italian restaurants. My daughter who is six years old still needs to be reminded to use her utensils and not her fingers and to sit properly in her chair from time to time. In other words, she needs to be reminded to use her restaurant manners. So, upon leaving the restaurant after our meal, we couldn't help but beam with pride when a woman at a neighboring table complimented my daughter for her excellent table manners and her behavior in general. Then it happened. Totally out of left field the woman asked if we were my daughter’s parents… [more]

I originally sat down to type out a blog post about abnormal symptoms after giving birth and how they can lead to secondary infertility. When I started doing some basic research (Google and Wikipedia) I was shocked to find nothing. I could find a lot of websites that discussed the post partum phase but none talked about when to be concerned, expect in regards to depression. Some websites had people who talked about how they experienced a certain side effect for a few weeks and then another person would discuss how they dealt with it for a few months. Which one was normal? Would the woman who had night sweats, excessive bleeding, or nipple engorgement for months end up later having… [more]

The Southeast Chapter of RESOLVE is having it's first annual Family Building Conference on May 1st in Atlanta, Georgia (CLICK HERE for more information). Beyond being a spectacular idea - getting people together with experts to discuss issues surroung infertility - it is also very well named! The conference intends to "address the medical, emotional, social, financial and legal issues associated with infertility and adoption." There are also some awesome give-aways, including a chance at a free IVF cycle and a free donor egg cycle, but I digress (as I am apt to do when someone says the word free). What struck me the most about the informational email I received about the conference… [more]

It seems to me that a certain phenomena exists among those struggling with fertility that involves a "competition" of sorts among those having trouble conceiving. Those who are "just" trying clomid or similar medications to induce ovulation don't know true suffering. If you are successful with IUI or injectibles you haven't really had to endure the hard stuff. If one IVF cycle works you can't imagine the pain of multiple failed cycles. If you use donor eggs or donor sperm you are in a club of your own and so on. Same thing goes for age - if you are 24 and proclaim that you have been trying for sooo long, it is really hard for someone… [more]

According to RESOLVE, A National Infertility Association that is an excellent resource and support outlet, over three million Americans are affected by secondary infertility and in fact it has "a higher prevalence rate than primary infertility." Secondary infertility came onto my radar after I learned that a friend with a seven year-old child was struggling to conceive and had been trying for a sibling for her daughter for several years. I had never really given much thought to this very common problem, and if I am being honest was probably more often in the camp of "they should be happy they have a child." As I talked more and more to the friend suffering through Secondary Infertility I realized just… [more]

In this era of "octomoms" and families of 8 or 18 it is easy to understand how people can have misconceptions about infertility and its treatment. As I was searching for information and statistics regarding multiple births and fertility treatment (out of pure curiosity), I realized that there are A LOT of myths and misunderstandings when it comes to reproductive challenges and assistance. I, like a lot of other people, don't always know the difference between truth and fiction when it comes to infertility and so I thought I would use this blog as a forum to address some of those myths and try to find the truths. Probably one of the most prevalent general ideas about IVF… [more]

Today a friend of mine who has struggled with secondary infertility for six years gave birth to a healthy baby boy! The event prompted me to think back on our many conversations about trying to conceive and how afraid and scared we were to try IVF. My overwhelming wish throughout that time was to just finally get pregnant naturally and not have to "pull the trigger" and try in-vitro. As I remembered these thoughts and feelings I was shocked at the realization that now that I look back at my fertility journey I am actually glad that we moved on to IVF. That is definitely not something that I ever thought I would say… [more]

Women who have never been able to conceive a baby or carry a baby to term have what is known as primary infertility. Women who have had one or more successful pregnancies but are later unable to conceive or carry a baby to term have secondary infertility. Both women suffer an enormous amount of pain, but, in some circles, women who struggle with secondary infertility are left out in the cold.

I wrote a post about Secondary Infertility in mid-August, and a reader left this comment:

When I was looking to start a fertility support group, a friend told a friend about it. Even though this woman was distraught over her infertility and definitely needed support, she declined to join our group because she already had a biological child. She suffered from a condition known as secondary infertility, which means that she was able to conceive a child but then later was unable to conceive again.

The woman believed that she did not deserve the same support as the other women in the group because she already had a child. Even though I also already had a child (through adoption), she saw this as different because I was still struggling with primary infertility (unable to conceive… [more]