When you are in the midst of battling your fertility, it is easy to buy into the lie that every single moment of your life is terrible. As I was living through it, I believed that my entire 4-1/2 year journey to parenthood was one big dark cloud of pain. However, in retrospect, I realize that I have happy memories from events that happened during the time that I was going through fertility treatments.

There was my friend's wedding, where I was a bridesmaid and had to wear a knee brace that prevented me from bending my leg. Meanwhile, another bridesmaid had her foot in a cast and could not straighten out her leg. We looked like the bridal party had been a barroom brawl the night before, and it was comical because we could not look the same whether sitting or standing because I could not bend my leg and the other bridesmaid could not straighten hers. The bride tried to make the best of things by weaving flowers through the other bridesmaid's crutches, but there was not much we could do with my jet-black knee brace.

There was the beginning of a friendship I developed by mentoring a middle school student - a relationship I would not have started if I had become pregnant when I planned. I remember the first time I met this shy little girl. She was so insecure that she covered her face the entire time during our first meeting with the school counselor. As she became more comfortable with me, her hand moved to just covering her mouth and then to her chin until I eventually saw her beautiful face. Today - 10 years later - she is a confident young woman who is my most faithful pen pal.

Then there were the happy times with my sister and nephew. My sister and I had grown apart during our early adult years, but I sought to reconnect with her when her son was born because I wanted to be active in my nephew's life. I have numerous happy memories of going with my sister and nephew to children's activities. Even though my heart would sometimes break with longing to bring my own child along, I would not trade the memories of watching my nephew dress up like Blue from "Blue's Clues" for Halloween or get icing all over his face after eating a cupcake. And, because of this investment years ago, my sister is my best friend today and the only person I know who actually wants to talk on the phone multiple times a day.

Even when we are in the midst of a painful time, there are little blessings around us if we chose to look.

Related Topics:

• Is There Anything Positive About Being Infertile?
• Surviving Fertility Treatments by Mentoring
• Infertility: What Lessons Are You Learning?

Photo credit: Lynda Bernhardt