While I was going through fertility treatments, I became very depressed. I found myself in a deep funk and had no idea how to pull myself out of it. I was listening to a talk radio show when a woman called in to talk about her own deep depression. The radio host asked her, "What have you done for somebody else lately?"

I thought that was a really weird question until I listened to the radio host's explanation. She talked about how depression keeps us focused on ourselves and that, when we reach outside of ourselves to help another person, we find relief from our own depression. I figured it was worth a shot. What did I have to lose?

It just so happened that a local middle school was looking for people to mentor students, and they sent an advertisement to my place of employment. I went to the orientation and agreed to mentor a very shy 13-year-old girl. I committed to seeing her one hour a week during the school day (during my lunch break from work), where we would just sit and talk.

I learned more about the Spice Girls and Dawson's Creek than I ever cared to know, but I watched this very shy and awkward girl grow into a lovely young woman. Ten years later, we stay in touch as pen pals because I moved to another state. Even though we have each other's e-mail addresses and phone numbers, we enjoy "snail-mailing" each other. Her letters have moved on to topics that are more substantial as our relationship has changed and she has matured. She is such a blessing in my life - someone whose life was touched by my choice to spend a mere one hour a week with her.

Now when I look back on the 4-1/2 years it took for me to become a mother, I do not see wasted time. If I had conceived right away, I never would have mentored this child, and I would not have this adult friend in my life today. For Christmas last year, she gave me a teddy bear with a framed picture of her from when she was thirteen years old. The frame says, "God is not the only one who loves you." That is one of my most cherished possessions, which I keep in a special place in my bedroom. As I look at that shy and awkward little girl and think about the beautiful woman that she has become, I see the value that came about through my infertility. Who would have thought such a beautiful relationship would start by listening to a talk radio show?

Related Topics:

• Surviving the Wait: Volunteering
• Yes to mentors!

Photo credit: Rosanne Mooney