You might be fertility challenged if ...

• You know that a sperm wash does not involve water.
• You can easily determine on what day of the week your cycle started in April 2005.
• You ever worried about getting a traffic ticket while transporting a specimen cup.
• You know what an LH surge is.
• You think pap smears are a piece of cake.
• You can calculate a potential baby's due date in less than three seconds.
• Your spouse cringes whenever you go to the bathroom.
• You avoid Babies R Us like the plague.
• You own multiple calendars that track the phases of your cycle.
• You can commiserate with menopausal women about their hot flashes even though you are only in your thirties (or twenties!!).
• You kick yourself for all of the money you wasted on contraception.
• You dread Halloween, Christmas, and especially Mother's Day.
• You have made love when you are angry with your spouse because of good clinical timing.
• You know how to give yourself a shot in the thigh.
• Your husband knows how to give you a shot in the rear end.
• You can say words like sperm or vaginal secretions without blushing.
• You have been the only woman sitting with the husbands while your friends tended to their children.
• Your friends envy the silence of your house while you envy the noise of theirs.
• You know which store has the best buy on ovulation predictor kits.
• You cry each time a friend tells you that she is expecting a baby.
• You pretend that your pregnant friends really just have a basketball under their clothes.
• Your heart has broken while listening to your spouse's sobs.
• You have tried to work out a deal with God to become pregnant.
• You would rather jump into a pit of snakes than attend a baby shower.
• You know everything there is to know about fertility other than how to actually get pregnant.
• You avoid church on Mother's Day.
• You continue to be amazed that your body could possibly produce another tear.
• You know that you will be a good mother if only God/life/destiny will give you a chance.
• After crying your eyes out after one more failed attempt, you find the strength to pick yourself up and try again.
• You are determined to never, ever give up until you become a mom.

Related Topics:

• Infertility: Feeling Different
• Fertility and Babies, Babies Everywhere
• Take Control of Something